# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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