Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
