We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Randomize
