Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
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