Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
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