You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
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