Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
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