return my video game
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
Randomize
