Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
