do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Randomize
