Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Randomize
