Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Randomize
