Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
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