he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
