she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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