how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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