THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
