I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
Randomize
