Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
