we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
