glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
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