Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
