did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
Randomize
