I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Randomize
