Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize
