I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
Randomize
