Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
