I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
there is puke in my bra ... again
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
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