But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
When my options for Friday night are being a 3rd wheel or bringing a gay man as my date i need to focus on other things in life like having a successful career.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
