Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
