Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize