Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
