I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
Randomize