So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
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