Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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