It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
Send help, water and tortillas.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Randomize
