I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
