Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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