Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
