Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize
