This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
Randomize
