Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
Vodka?
Forever.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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