i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
