I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
PS: I just woke up from my shower
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
Randomize
