No stitches, just platelets and will power
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
