its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
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