Sry I called you an 8
At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
Randomize
