found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Randomize
