Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
Randomize
