Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
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